We all often make mistakes in dating. We break up, move on, and make the same mistakes in new relationships. Try again, fail better. It’s a vicious circle. But you understand that something is wrong, right? That’s why you are here.
How to get out of the vicious circle of making mistakes in dating? How to get into a healthy and strong relationship and maintain it? Here are 5 secrets for you.
1. They are clear about their intentions
Different people, especially in international dating, see relationships from different perspectives. For some dating is a way to learn more about each other in order to find a potential spouse. For others dating itself is a self-self-sufficient relationship which envisages no marriage.
Somebody longs for a long-term relationship, someone wants a short-term or even a hookup. For someone long-distance is a no-go, for others, it is a beam of hope.
Some people date to have support, others – to give that support. Somebody enters into a relationship by their own will, others expect their relatives to play a huge part in it.
So before your relationship starts turning into something serious, it is very important to have “the intentions-conversation” with your partner. Moreover, it is better to always ask what each of you wants in a relationship, otherwise, you’ll end up being on different pages.
2. Both partners are even
In a healthy and strong relationship both partners’ contribution on an emotional, physical and financial levels is even. It doesn’t mean that it’s the same, but it means that both not only take but also give, and they give as much as they can.
Both partners treat each other with respect. Basically, that’s the core of their relationship as well as romantic feelings, but not the money or something else. If you feel like you need to break up, but the money of your partner is what halts you – then it’s not a healthy relationship.
3. They know how to say sorry
There is no such thing as an ideal relationship. We all screw up sometimes. But the most important thing that we know how to say sorry. Moreover, strong couples also know how to forgive their partner. If you do not do this, you accumulate resentment and anger at each other. This kills love and respect, and each of your fights becomes more painful. You must listen to each other and acknowledge your mistakes. It does not matter what you have done, but you always have a chance for forgiveness if you asked for it. If you have not done this, you will not be forgiven and should not be surprised at this.
4. Strong couples have sweet «rituals»
They always find time for each other no matter what, their relationship is always a priority to them. The first thing they do every day is they wish a happy morning to each other and the last thing they do is wish a sweet night.
When they meet, they kiss each other. They aren’t shy to express their feelings in public like holding hands or hugging.
If they have kids, they make sure at least once in a while they find time for themselves and still go on dates regularly.
5. They accept each other the way they are
If your partner wishes you had a bigger ass or breasts, if your partner expects you to change the colour of your hair regularly because they want it, if your partner explicitly tells you that you are too fat or too skinny, dump them. They are not worth you.
In a strong and healthy relationship, partners accept each other flaws and all. This is obvious, because if someone is dissatisfied with you, then he / she is with you for his / her own benefit or manipulation. Do not be with people whose appearance or character seems unbearable to you. Just change your partner and live happily ever after.
6. They have plans for the future
It is impossible to build a life together without plans. You definitely need to talk about what each of you wants from life. It will be stupid if one is going to have children in 2 years and when this time comes, he learns that his spouse wants to travel the world and build a career. You must have a joint strategy. Do not continue to build relationships if your plans are different. Do not expect someone to change their minds or you can change them. If you are directly told that he / she does not want to move to another city or have children, you better break off your relationship right away. Look for a partner who is going to go the same way as you.
7. They have their personal lives
Each person’s life should not be built around only one spouse. You must have friends, hobbies, careers and everything that makes you happy. If someone is trying to take part of your life from you, this is a manipulative behavior that will not bring anything good to your life.
If you can not spend without each other and day, this does not mean great love, but about a destructive relationship. Create a balance in life and fill it with everything that is dear to you. Do not try to limit another person’s personal space and do not let others do this with you.